dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I have fence marks all over my body
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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