Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize