How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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