There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Randomize
