next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Randomize
