I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Randomize
