Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Randomize
