i think my tv is drunk
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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