He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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