i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Randomize
