How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
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