Plan B is the new Plan A
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Are we still banned from the library?
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
