So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
