She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
So vagazzling was a success
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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