I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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