just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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