Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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