is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
