Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
dude. I can hear the air.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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