Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
