STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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