Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
