Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
Randomize
