Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Randomize
