but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
