So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize