I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
