Got a toothbrush?
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
