Your tits are I can't wait for
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
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