i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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