you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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