new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just projectile vomited in a Methodist church parking lot. If Jesus didn't love me before he sure as hell doesn't now.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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