how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
He said he wanted to have kids with me so they could grow up to be professional linebackers. Not. A. Complient.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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