I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
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