That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
