I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
Randomize
