im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize