Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize