We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Randomize
