i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Randomize
