ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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