D3 body, D1 cock
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
