but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
