Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
The feeling are messing with the penis
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
