susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
Randomize
