Your tits are I can't wait for
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
