god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
A guy just tried to send me a pic of his penis & my phone sent me a disclaimer saying "the components were unsuitable for your terminal"
Even your phone knows you shouldn't sleep with him...
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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