How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
