I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
