The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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