At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
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