we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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